Anatomical Drunken Ramblings

Yep folks - still haven't gotten back to blogging about Tassie. In my defence I have been working 12-16 hours days and surviving on as little as 3 hours sleep.

So, as I sit here, on my third glass of a rather nice (and excessively cheap) red wine (and these are *large* glasses folks) I feel the urge to partake in some ramblings of the tipsy variety...

In an effort to increase the usable capacity of my PVR I've been force-watching recorded TV. Due to the excessive working hours I've been keeping, there is, fortunately, a large variety of programs saved. Tonight I partook of the most recent Grey's Anatomy.
And by the time I got to the end of it, I found myself bawling. No, not as some unkind people would say by the poor performances or daytime drama soapie story-lines, but by the personal commitments that was this week's themes. About life being the empowerment over death and one's chosen life commitment being the alternative to a hum-drum, depressive, unfulfilling life.

As they say....*spoilers* ahead.

By the end of the episode we have experienced:
The consequences of delaying that expression of commitment - the risk your soul mate has moved on.
A patient reconnected with her culturally distinct (Amish) parents after her best friend makes the sacrifice of letting her go.
Izzie finds a way to make Denny's money bring new hope.
George starts coming to terms with his Father's death and realises it is the people in his life that are important.
Christine accepts that the war is more important than an individual battle.
And Meredith admits to being a virgin in relationships.

This episode was about heart connections.
That even diametrically apposed life views (Amish and shunned) and connect. (First tears...),
That the chief made the right decision - but left it too late. (It's all about timing.),
That Izzie lets Denny go - and just got to *love* Miranda's spunk!
That Derek will be there for Meredith, no matter what. They may not connect, but he'll *be* there, even if he shouts, even if she shouts.
That Christine sees what really matters - she is making the long term commitment, she always was - or she would have walked away long ago. (Second tears...)
That George opens his heart and sees how truly amazing Kelly really is for him. (Outright bawling...)

So I'm sitting there, on the couch, 3rd *large* glass of wine in hand, trying to analyse why I am crying. All those years of Psychology at Uni catching up with me....
Was it the multiple marriage proposals? And nigh on accepting I am never going to get one....
Was it the feeling of affinity to Derek and Meredith's romantic position?
Was it the wine?

Actually - I think the moment that *really* got me, was Burke's proposal. The utter silence for weeks and weeks. The wondering why they were still together. Christina's acceptance of the war over the individual battle but still being able to maintain her own sense of right and justice and integrity. Bourke's proposal was *not* out of the blue. He just simply doesn't operate like that. This was in his mind for a long time. I suspect eventually we will find out just how long.

**** Important Footnotes
This blog post is *NOT* aimed at getting a marriage proposal. Rest easy B.
While marriage is something that will always remain in my life goals - for reasons many will not understand, and possibly a subject of a much later drunken post - I have accepted that the war is more important that an individual battle.

And no, I'm not ashamed of a blog almost entirely based on a Grey's Anatomy episode.
it touched me to the core - and that really should be good enough for you!

Sometimes I wonder....

Sometimes I wonder whether I'm in the right career... it's not that I don't love the individual parts of my job, the pattern matching of incidents to find underlying commonalities and then tracking it down to the true cause to the satisfaction of all...
the control I have over the processes with the joy of seeing everything running smoothly...
even the interactions with other members of my team - aiming to understand where they are coming from and what they need in order to perform their job...

But it's the strangeness where the boss offers a copy of New Scientist out and I am leaping out of my chair wanting to be the first one, only to find I am the *only* one...
It's having to explain the soulful satisfaction of Kombis as a preference over BMW's...
It's listening to conversations about cultural / religious differences, where it's obvious that they just don't get it....
It's the mini cauldron on my desk filled with crystals that only one person has figured out...
It's the utter dis-belief that this stubborn, assertive, logical, control freak is a knitter...

Yes we embrace diversity. My section could be an ad for Benetton, but that doesn't mean that with diversity comes an automatic understanding and appreciation of the cultural, personal, religious, spiritual values of others.

What is it that gives someone that ability to see the bigger picture, to truly appreciate diversity - not just as a phrase to be worshipped...
Is it something that comes from having experienced discrimination?
Or is an open mind something that just is and cannot be developed?
How do we encourage open minds in others? Is it something that can be nurtured in the young?